Monday, June 02, 2008

Totally random crap that you just can't wait to hear about

How many tea parties do you have every day? Elle and I have about 14. We sip our tea and then say "Oh! It's still hot!" Then we eat "chicken" and proclaim it to be "spicy". Then we eat "corn" and say it's "delicious". And it just never gets old. EVER!

Day 13 of WiiFit: I haven't lost any weight, my thighs and chest hurts and yoga often leaves me feeling like I'm going to hurl. Hooray for fitness!

This morning I was sitting on the toilet doing what one does while sitting on the toilet when I realized the bathroom window was open. How did I realize that? A big gust of wind came along and blew the curtain aside leaving me and all my pants-around-the-ankles glory exposed to the 3 roofers working on the house next door. I hope they enjoyed the show. And by "show" I mean the slapstick comedy that occurred when I sprang up from the toilet, lunged towards the window, tripped over my own pants and nearly crashed through the screen. All without actually managing to close the curtain so that it was just me and my naked ass pressed up against the window.

The other night I had a dream that I was visiting Pioneer Woman. It started out great. She made a bunch of great food for me to eat. Then it took a turn. I spilled a bunch of food on myself and had to go take a bath to clean up. As I was bathing all the cowboys came in and started laughing at me. I woke up feeling depressed but soothed myself by eating some chocolate sheet cake.

I wonder why I'm not losing any weight?

Elle is playing with Play-Doh right now and she's mixing up colors and it is KILLING ME because I am far to anal retentive and I prefer that the Play-Doh in my house not be mixed up. It's taking everything I've got in me right now to not go and knock her off her little chair so that I stop the maddness. YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW!

Please, please, please enter my contest. No one has so far and that is the sort of thing that has the potential to damage my very fragile self-esteem. And then I'll be forced to eat more chocolate cake. Yes, forced. So please, if you won't do it for me and you won't do it for yourself (because for some reason you don't want to win a fabulous prize) then do it for the poor chocolate sheet cakes of the world. Because without your help? I'm totally going to eat them all.


Anonymous said...

I love dream food. It has no fat and only 1 calorie.

Cathy said...

I'll enter your contest. Once school is done. (Thurs.)
WiiFit. What all can you do with it? Do you love it? Is it worth getting Wii just to get WiiFit??? I'm getting jealous...

Barbara said...

I'll take a chocolate sheet cake... :) I'll write up a post or two for you tomorrow evening.

Sheila said...

Oooh, mixing play-doh colors is not okay. I mean, really. If I ever have children, I'm certain that they may only have one color of play-doh at a time.

ps - thanks to you, I'm now getting the same bizarre googling that you mentioned on my blog. It makes me literally laugh when I see it on my stats.

Jen said...

wheelsonthebus - Yes, but when you spill it on yourself cowboys laugh at you. So there's a downside.

cathy - I really like the WiiFit. It manages to make working out halfway fun. There are going to be more games coming out that you can do with it soon wo I think it's totally worth getting the Wii for. I love the Wii anyway though so I might be biased.

barbara - Hooray! I'm going to eat some cake in your honor.

sheila - "long hanging boobs"? So you're getting those searches now eh? I wondered where all of my perverts had gone.

Chris said...

My boyfriend loves his WiiFit a little bit too much. So much that I'm worried he might leave me for his virtual yoga instructor. My Mii is programmed in there to serve as a permenant reminder of the sanctity of her relationship, but it keeps on falling on its face during jogging so I don't hold out much hope.

Anonymous said...

Hi Jen, I've been blog stalking you since you were pregnant with Elle. I happened upon your blog one boring evening. We are so much a like it's frightening - except that I'm a Black girl from NYC born the day after you.

Anywho, yes I understand your PlayDoh pain. I suffer from the same issue since I was four. I DEMANDED my own playdoh so that my brother wouldn't mix the colors!!!

I'm convinced each color playdoh has it's own marvelously delicious smell. . . okay maybe I went too far with that one. But I love the smell of new playdoh!

Jen said...

christopher - I don't blame your boyfriend. The wiifit guy is kinda cute. I can't totally fall for him though because he always makes me feel so bad when I'm a little shaky doing yoga.

missjuly21 - You've been reading since I was pregnant with Elle? Really? But I was so boring back then! It pains me to read that old stuff. Thank you for sticking with me! I think you're wrong about each playdoh color having it's own smell though. It's own taste maybe but not smell.

Givinya De Elba said...

Loved the quote on Blogtations! I don't often laugh out loud, but I'm sorry, your story was too funny, and told really well :) The roofers!! Oh no.

Today someone got to me by googling "winnie the pooh on ukulele". Wow. Haven't had perverts yet, just people wanting ukulele-related ... things ...