Has anyone in this family ever even seen a chicken?

Joseph has never watched Arrested Development but he can do an impression of Gob acting like a chicken that just kills me. One day he was in another room talking to Jesse and I heard him (Joseph) say "What are you? A chicken? Cah-cah-chaw! Cah-cah-chaw!" He's now refined his impression and it includes arm waving, hand clapping and leg kicking.

Here's the kicker though. Elle has seen him do it so many times that now she does it too. She hears him do it and then, in her chirpy little voice she joins in with "cah-cah-caaaahhhhh!" We're also teaching her to say "Annyong". She's pretty close. The kid only just yesterday learned to say "nigh-nigh" but she can already to two running gags from AD.

In other kid news, the little boy who called Joseph a baby now knows how it feels to be called a name. Last week at school he bumped Joseph as he was taking off his jacket and Joseph called him the meanest name he could think of. Fortunatly the meanest thing he could think of was "ballerina". The teacher pulled them both aside and they all had a talk about how it feels to be called a name and how they can better handle problems. Joseph said they both learned a lesson and it seems to have taken care of the problem. If it comes back up again I'm going to have to teach him some better insults though.

If you have a few prayers or good thoughts just laying around feel free to send them IDAT's way. She just gave birth to her first child, a GIANT baby boy and they're both in need of a little healing power right now. She's one tough mother-trucker though so I know both she and baby Jackson are going to be ok but a few extra good wishes thrown her way couldn't hurt.

Just call me Ol' Crusty Eyes

Pinkeye! Ihave flipping pinkeye! What the hell?

A second opinion

Turns out my elbow may not be fractured after all. I saw a doctor yesterday and he says he didn't see a fracture on the x-ray, he thinks I bruised my watchamacallit nerve (the one that hurts when you bang your funny bone). He took the splint off so that I can move my arm around because I guess that's supposed to help it get better. It may be helping, but damn! My arm hurts like a sonofabitch.

The good news is that I can now say that I've never broken a bone. Yes! The streak continues!

Short post

This is a short post because I fractured my elbow yesterday nd now I can only type with my left hand. My right arm has a splint on it and is in a sling. I'll find out on Monday how long it will need to stay on but I bet it won't be for too long.

If you're wondering what it feels like to fracture your elbow the best way I can explain it is that it feels like you're hitting your funny bone over and over and over again.

It took me forever to type this. More later.

Babies love R-rated movies

Yesterday Elle was playing with the tv remote control and somehow managed to purchase a pay-per-view movie. Add this to the list of things I never thought I would have to say as a parent: "No Elle! No buying Aeon Flux for $4.95! No bad Charlize Theron movies! The reviews are very bad Elle, very bad!"

Not much new

Not much going on here. The kids seem to be almost better. Elle still has giant, green boogers in her nose all the time and Joseph has a little bit of a cough but otherwise they seem ok.

The other day at therapy we ran into one of Joseph's little friends and they were so excited to see each other. His friend ran up to him and said "Joseph! Can you come to my house for a playdate?" Joseph's eyes got HUGE and he couldn't even talk. He was so excited when I said that we could work it out in the next week or so! The little boy seems nice and his mom (who also seems nice) and I chat every day when we come to pick our kids up. I'm glad he found a nice little friend.

One little boy in Joseph's class is not so nice. I guess he called Joseph a baby and was messing with Joseph's blanket at nap time. I talked to his teacher and she promised to keep an eye on things. When I told her the name of the little boy who did it she kind of made a face and said that she wasn't too suprised that he was the one. I figured it was better to be sure that she was aware of the situation since Joseph doesn't always know what to do when dealing with someone who's more aggresive like that. Anyway, the alternative was that I went into the classroom and grabbed the kid by the collar and shook him around for a while. As satisfying as that would be..... yeah, I probably better not do that.

Is that Barney over there?

We are sick. Elle, Joseph and I all have big bad colds. Both the kids have ear infections too. We're a fun group to be around. Jesse knew I was feeling bad yesterday when he saw what I was wearing. I broke out my giant purple nightshirt. I haven't worn that thing since the night before Elle was born. This thing is huge. Even when I was 9 months pregnant it was loose on me. It's perfect for wearing when you're sick.

So now the kids are in bed and I am going to take a big dose of Nyquil and conk out myself. If you're in need of a good read then check out IDAT over there on the right. She's an awesome woman.

Joseph's big news

Joseph is done with physical therapy. He's met all of his goals so he's all done. Hooray! They'll re-evaluate him hin a year to see how he's doing and as long as no problems come up before that he's all done.

He'll continue going to food therapy, speech therapy and behavioral therapy once a week and I'm going to ask about having occupational therapy added to his schedule again. He still needs some extra help with writing and stuff so I think that might be good for him.

But for now it's nice to have one less thing Joseph has to do. He's pretty happy too. He told me that he's glad because now he'll be able to run faster at recess. Now I'm weepy.

My big news

Ok, so here's the deal. Assuming we can sort out a little issue with insurance coverage I will be working with a surrogacy agency in the next few months. If it all works out I will carry a pregnancy, most likely for a gay couple (or single person). I won't know anything for sure until they get get the insurance issue cleared up and I have no idea how long that will take. I also won't be able to move forward until Elle has been weaned since I would have to go on fertility drugs and I can't do that while I'm nursing. But I have been accepted by an agency and they say they think they could find a match for me pretty soon. We'll see what happens.

So that's my news.

What a card

Today I talked to Joseph's case manager (the person in charge of his special ed services) and she said what a funny he kid he was. She told me that she was talking to him in his classroom this morning and there was a little boy crying loudly while they were trying to talk. Joseph watched the kid for a minute and then said to his case manager "He's kind of a drama queen isn't he?" She told me she almost had to walk away from him for a minute to compose herself.

When I picked him up from school today he told me this: "All the lunch ladies at my school look the same. But a girl in my class told me her brother works in the lunch room. (long pause) How can a boy be a lunch lady? Unless maybe he wears makeup to look like all the others.....?" He's a funny boy.

School update

Joseph loves school! He loves going out on the playground. He loves eating in the cafateria. He loves having a locker with his name on it. He loves storytime. He loves it all. I'm so relieved.

The only complaint he had was that at lunch the corn had "season" on it. I think he meant seasoning. I guess he only ate about 4 bites for lunch but he's pretty sure that tomorrow's lunch will be better. I'm so proud of him!

Joseph's first day

It's quiet in this house. Too quiet.

Joseph is at his first day of school. I miss him already. When Jesse dropped him off he offered to stay for a couple of minutes but Joseph told him that he was fine and that he could leave. When did he get so grown up?

Joseph's teacher seemed really, really nice. He has someone with him at lunch to help him out with all his food stuff and she seemed nice too. I think this is going be a good school for Joseph. He was excited because his classroom has Beanie Babies in it. He's so easy to please. I'll update later with how his day went.

Mr Manners

Judy came by to see the kids today. At one point she said "Joseph, I'm going to use the bathroom ok?"

Joseph responded as any other 6 year old would. "Of course! In fact, I would be offended if you didn't!"

Such a funny kid! What am I going to do when he's at school all day?