One more step in the process
I've scheduled my time to go to the hospital and meet with a "care manager" to discuss my birth plan. It shouldn't be too complicated, I know pretty well what I do and do not want. What I think might throw a wrench in the whole thing is that J is going to be there.
I can picture it now. I'll be there laying out exactly what I want ("No pitocin, no episiotomy, no monitoring device that keeps me strapped to the bed, no automatic IV") and J will be in the corner quietly freaking out. Once I finish talking he'll pull out some notes he made after doing research on birth online (at sites like totallyuntruefacts.com and worrywartparents.org) and start stressing out about some off the wall statistic he found that said 7% of the 12% of women who don't get at least 67% of the recommended blah blah blah blah and shouldn't I reconsider?
The good news is that I feel pretty comfortable putting my foot down and saying that while this may be his baby this is my birth and I am the one that has to be comfortable with how it goes down. I won't be pressured into doing something that I'm not totally comfortable with.
The big change between this birth and when I had Elle is that I'm going to try to go without an epidural. I know that might be crazy and I might change my mind halfway into it but I'm going to try. With Elle I was so scared of the pain that I would have gotten an epidural at 24 weeks pregnant if I could have. I don't regret getting the epidural but I do wonder how I would have done without one.
The other big change is that I'm going to refuse any artificial methods to move my labor along. With Elle I had pitocin (I really wasn't even asked, it was just given to me and I was informed after the fact) and I had my water broken. None of that this time if I can avoid it at all. I feel like I'm a lot more knowledgeable about the natural process of labor this time around and I think that it might be better to let my body do what it needs to on it's own than to force it.
So I can see how my go-with-the-flow and trust-the-process way of approaching this birth might stress out Mr MedicalInterventionForNorReason. Remember, this is the guy who wanted me to get an amnio just for the pure joy of it. Maybe I'll lessen the shock of it all by letting him in on my plans little by little now. That way when the meeting comes on January 12th I won't totally blow him out of the water.
Who am I kidding? He's gonna freak no matter what.
Jen
4 comments:
You mean, all the stuff I found on (totallyuntruefacts.com) is no good?
Aside from actually carrying the child for nine months, I think the negotiations with the parents about this kind of thing would be the hardest part. I so admire what you're doing.
Wow, that would be hard when you know what you want and he's so "paranoid" (is that the way to describe it?) I'm sure all he wants is a healthy baby, but it shouldn't be at the expense of your comfort (well, other than the pregnancy general uncomfortableness! ;)
I wanted to do the all natural method as long as possible, but I did leave my options open and I'm so glad that I did. Turns out my body couldn't relax from the pain and after 24 + hours of labor I had to have an epidural to get past a 5 dilation. Then it was just a few hours til he was born.
I guess all I'm saying is I hope it works for you the way you want it to! And I'm guessing since you've already had one that your body will know what to do more than mine did! ;) Definitely don't let them do the pitocin/suction/forceps unless it's a super last resort though.
Thinking of you, and I think you are perfectly within your rights to do it your way. Hang tough.
I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
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