Tuesday, May 12, 2009

The universe wants you to see me naked

How often do you accidentally flash people? Because it seems to happen to me a lot. See here and here for proof. And that's only a fraction of the time. Most of my public flashings have never made it to this blog. Like the time I was a pallbearer at my grandfather's funeral and I was wearing a long, flowing skirt. As we were carrying the coffin to the grave a gust of wind came along and blew my long, flowing skirt up into my face. It's difficult to look solemn and dignified when you're frantically trying to swat your long, flowing skirt out of your face and keep everyone from seeing your funeral panties.

I don't think most people find themselves exposed to the general public as often as I do. Maybe I'm wrong though. Maybe everyone has brief moments of accidental nakedness. Let's find out shall we? Let's take this little quiz.

You go out to lunch with your friend. You are wearing a loose fitting shirt. When you leave the restaurant you...
A. buckle your child into her car seat without incident and drive home.
B. lean over to buckle your child into her car seat and feel a large gust of wind blow your loose fitting shirt up over your head. As you wildly paw at your shirt you catch your hand on your bra and nearly cause both boobs to pop out and psychologically scar all of downtown St Cloud.

If you answered A you are a normal person. If you answered B you are me. Or at least a person like me. But I really don't think this kind of stuff happens to everyone else. Or does it?

Two years ago today Joseph explained digestion.
Three years ago today we went to a open house and it was boring.
Four years ago today I was pretty sure being pregnant made you gassy.

6 comments:

Jen said...

I heard that the traffic on St. Germain increased three-fold this afternoon with hopes of catching another show.... ;)

Mrs. Schmitty said...

BWAHHHAAAA!

Ben said...

I have relatively few bra related mishaps. Relatively.

Esther said...

Wow. Funny stuff. You've shown more skin in Northern MN than Sugar Daddy's! ;-)

Emily said...

The only time I exposed myself in such a fashion (that I'm aware of,) I was wearing breakaway pants in gym class and they busted opent o reveal-- a black sequin thong that had white puff balls on the side... me and my friends had all bought a pair as a joke sorta. In the end... the joke was on me, of course.

Anonymous said...

Oh man this shit happens to me all the time.
I flashed my hoo-ha through the window to the neighbors 4 preteen grandsons on Easter Sunday most recently.
Good times.