Yard decorations ..... OF DEATH

Whenever I talk about adding something to the yard to make it look nicer Jesse shoots the idea down with "I don't know, I worry about the kids falling and hitting their heads on that."

I was reading about compost bins (of course I was) and I read that it's a good idea to plant herbs all around the bins. I said maybe we should do that and then put up some small bricks around the edge to separate the herbs from the grass. The response was "I don't know, what if the kids are running around outside and they trip and hit their heads on the bricks?"

After we took the cancer logs out of our garden we toyed with the idea of putting granite blocks around the garden. Guess why that was nixed. "The kids might trip and fall and hit their heads on the blocks."

A rock garden? The kids might fall and hit their heads. A fountain? The kids might fall and hit their heads. An in ground sprinkler system? The kids might trip over it and fall and hit their heads on one of the 10,000 other death traps we have placed in our yard.

I don't mean to make fun of Jesse's fears. In fact, I understand where they come from. When he was a little boy he was dancing to a Disco Mickey album and he tripped ... and fell ... and hit his head.

Obviously this event had a profound effect on Jesse and it forever shaped the way he looked at lawn decor. I think if he had his way we would just put throw pillows all over the yard. It might look stupid but just think of how unalarmed we would be if one of the kids tripped and fell and hit their heads.

So what do you think? Are Jess's fears irrational? Or is he right to think that the second a hard object is placed in our yard the childrens heads will be drawn to it like soft, vulnerable magnets?

Two years ago I wanted someone to rub my nuts.
Four years ago I had an odd craving.