Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Decisions, decisions

As I was getting stitched up from my episiotomy after giving birth to A I asked my doctor "So when can I do this again?"

I was dead serious too. We're taking a family vacation in September so I won't be able to get pregnant before that but I am thinking that it's probably time to start the process again. Paperwork and getting everything in line can take a while and I want to have that all done so that when the time comes I can get started with the "fun" part right away.

Now I have a choice to make. Do I stick with the agency I used last time? I was mostly happy with them but I'm not entirely thrilled with certain aspects of their non-negotiable contract. I also found out today that if I work with them again I'll have to go through their entire screening process again. I don't see that being a problem but it is a little bit of a hassle. That means a minimum of three more trips to LA (psych eval, matching and transfer) and that's if everything goes ok.

Or do I try to find a new agency? Maybe one that lets me change around the contract a little bit? My current agency has a c-section comp that is insanely low and I'm really not comfortable with it. But what if I find another agency and they end up dropping the ball on things that my current agency has been good about?

Or do I try to pursue one of the two independent opportunities that have come my way? B and J know two couples who are currently looking into surrogacy and apparently B praised me so highly that they both asked about meeting me. I like certain things about the idea of an independent match but other parts about it scare me. If something goes wrong I'll be on my own without an experienced agency on my side. I don't know if I feel like I know the whole process well enough to do it on my own.

What to do, what to do?


~JJ! said...

Wow girl. Whoever finds you is one lucky family!

You rock.

Anonymous said...

Wow! You are incredible! As an infertility patient myself (I have twins), I can honestly say that the sacrifices you are making to help other people reach their dream of being parents means the world to them. I have a friend who has twins through a surrogate. It is an incredible gift you have given. The fact that you are ready to give it so willingly is awesome!

Jerseygirl89 said...

I wish I had some advice, but I don't really know anything except that it is amazing that you are so giving and generous.

nell said...

You truly are amazing.

I think I would probably go with an agency since, as you pointed out, if something does go wrong, it would be terrible to be on your own. And if the agency from the last surrogacy is going to make you go through the screening process again anyway, it might be worth doing a little research into some others.

Anonymous said...

I have no experience with this, but my gut says go with an agency. Going out on your own is always very risky.

sam said...

You're amazing. Absolutely amazing! Whoever does find you is completely blessed.

(And your first line nearly had me spitting my water out. I think pushing out another one was the furthest thing from my mind while I was being stitched. LOL)

andi said...

I can't believe you're considering it so soon after the last one. You are awesome! And I'll just echo the comments of everyone else - I would stick with an agency.